At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Randomize
