I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
