Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Randomize
