This house was built for laser tag.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
