I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
