? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
