Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
All the doctor said was why
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
