you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
