i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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