Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Randomize
