if only i could text you this smell
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Randomize
