no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
