Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
