just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
