oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
You need a sexual gate keeper
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
