do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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