If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
