And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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