i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
You're like the curious george of whores
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Randomize
