That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
