dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
