i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
We have so much sex to catch up on
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
