Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize