these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
