guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
