trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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