So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
