i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
