Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
