nutella sex= disaster
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
