What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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