Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
