these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
