Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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