i will never coherently bang her
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
