no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
His nipple licking is glorious
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