His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
