My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize
