I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Your mouth is God's brothel.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
