omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
And then my night got REAL pukey
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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