Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
