Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
