good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
