Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
