i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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