Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize