i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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