Just mADE A PArabola og urine
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
