why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
