I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
